Akatsukibbles 'n Bits
by Xx-Silent Ookami-Xx
Summary: On Christmas morning, Sakura discovers something odd near the front lawn. What could ever be inside? A kunai set, perhaps Sasuke-kun? Shrouded in delight, she slips outdoors then carries the present back home; completely oblivious to the possibility that her life will slowly spirals out of control once the lid falls off. Hold on a bit, these aren't normal dogs.. aren't they?-Crack!
1. Oh geez

Hiya! Merry Christmas! Happy Kwanzaa and the other one! Wait a minute. I think it's Hanukkah. Anyways, this is a very special fan fic that I never thought of doing until now. It might take a while to get updated though. But guess what? I have a week off from school! That gives me plenty of enough time to finish it. It might go on for months though. Let's begin.

Loud Hollow Night

**Summary: It was a quiet day in Konoha on Christmas day. All the Akatsuki are gone, and Danzo too. Wait a minute, what's that huge red and green colored Christmas present covered up in a giant blue bow doing near the door way? Let's go see shall we? Parings: SakuraXDeidara, SakuraXHidan, SakuraXSasori, SakuraXItachi and SakuraXPein. Sometimes PeinXKonan and the humorous TobiXSakura!**

* * *

**~ Chapter 0: Frozen preclude**

It was a quiet day in the leaf village until--

"MERRY CHRISTMAS KONOHA!" boomed a voice though the whole village.

"Ugh, who the fuck is awaking me like that?" slurred an old man.

"It's the Kyuubi! It decided to rein terror on us all on Christmas day!" complained a non shinobi.

"Aww, whatever. Just leave him. It's Christmas after all.."

Yes it is, by the way the most corniest day of them all. Well, to Sakura Haruno it is. The seventeen old pinkett didn't like the damn holiday because the boys in her village kept coming up with a whole bunch of silly ways to act like a pervert near her. Missile toe, Santa boxers that had a whole cut near there cock. Those types of things. But why her though? Hinata will faint then die if the boys tried anything on her. Epically if it was Naruto. Ten Ten and Ino would do nothing but enjoy it which did pissed the males off. What's the point of bothering a girl if she doesn't fight back?

**Ding dong**

The door bell awoken the kunoichi from her evil long but good slumber. "Wha?" she mumbled lazily.

**Ding! Ding! Dong! Dong! Knock! Knock!**

Said kunoichi smiled a sly smile. "Oh, so the villagers poisoned you with yellow snow and now you can't talk no more Naruto?"

Silence. Which was not the pinkett's greatest virtue.

**'Hey! Open the fucking door already!' **shouted inner Sakura. 'I'll hit him with this icicle that froze in her last night.' threatened inner.

_'Oh inner. That's not necessary for Naruto. We need something else.'_

**'Like what?'**

A fruit cake. Naruto can't stand fruit cake and everybody else in the village. Konoha was known as the critics that voted out the fruit cakes bitter existence. It was rare to find just a loaf of it in konoha, but Sakura had it. Oh the horror to be blessed with a nasty loaf of rotten cake with silly pieces of colorful fruit inside. She only bought it from Iwa's shops just last week while going on a mission to their village.

Sakura was inching her way to the door with the fruit cake in her hands. "Oh Naruto.." she purred.

Bang! She opened the door to her apartment. "Merry Christmas!" the kunoichi threw the fruit cake at the familiar foe.

But there was no Naruto nearby at her house on Christmas day. With a short huff the kunoichi walked into the snow forgetting it was freezing outside and picked up the nasty wet cake with fruit in it. Sakura withdrew her face from the cake. There was no fruit in it. Most of it was on the ground in the wet puddles of snow called winter.

**'Aahahahaha!' **laughed inner.** 'You gonna eat that?'**

Sakura made up a sour face."Hell no!" she walked back to her house and saw a huge box tied back with a blue ribbon.

_'What's that? What could be inside it?'_

BARK! BARK! BARK!

Ugh, you do not want to know.

end of chapter 0..

* * *

There you have it. A short as preclude. Well it won't be as soon as the real chapters start. The reason why I'm doing another story is because my mind is kinda frozen at the moment. I should play more sonic unleashed right. Now. Merry Christmas and please review so we could get this story choo chooing like the polar express.


	2. Guess who

**Damn, what was up with this chapter? It had too much errors and shit, it was driving me bonkers. Hello there, this is a revised version of chapter one. Another chapter is sill in the making. Enjoy.  
**

Loud Hollow Night

Chapter 1: Guess who's here?..

Twitch, twitch, twitch.

A young kunoichi's light pink eye brows wiggled here and there around on her upper face like a caterpillar.

Something was there, located in that humongous box tied down with a blue ribbon settled on top. But what was it exactly? She tensed and stirred in horror as the box began to jump up and down and shake continuously. Maybe it was a bomb that Naruto sent as a cover up for earlier. Yeah, that's it. Sakura started to laugh like a hysterical witch when another bark entered through her mind.

"Bark! Bark! Bark!" Echoed the box.

"Who's there?" Asked Sakura as she looked around the open scenery.

**"Auugh, it's Cujo!**" Inner screamed. **"Look at his eyes!"**

Yellow eyes filled with killer intent stared at Sakura from beyond the box. She jumped in fear and ran back into the house with a short fit. While the kunoichi made a break for it and ran for her dear life, the top part which held the box together went back in place taking camouflage with the rest of the box's giant form.

**~Back in the house~**

Green eyes stared at the evil box that took refuge on her front lawn and stared contently through the frosty glass window right next to her door. Her right hand was busy clenching the window pane while the other was holding onto the white curtains.

_'Geez, who the hell sent me a killer beast in a green box?'_

**'Maybe it was Sasuke.'**

_'Naw, Sasuke doesn't hate me that much to send that 'thing' to my house.'_

Or did he?

Finished with pacing around the room for hours and hours, Sakura ran towards the window to look again at the intruders. She raised her hand and used the two index finger and ring finger to clear the fog away so she can keep an eye on it. That's strange, the lid was down on the snow as if someone has already opened it. Who could it have been?

Naruto, Kakashi, Ino, Ten Ten, Neji, Kiba? Naw, Kakashi would have used a much serious and perverted prank than that. Ten Ten would have thought of using armed weapons while Neji wouldn't give a damn and go leave to meditate or something. Kiba, he's just Kiba. Back to Naruto who was apparently not swiped of her prankster memo.

**'Hehehe, Naruto left. He probably had to go take a piss in the bushes.' **Chuckled inner.

_'I don't think that was Naruto inner.'_

**'Then who is it then?'**

Bang! A loud sound could be heard from the kitchen. Sakura's eyes narrowed and sweat poured from her temples as she quielty made her way for the kitchen. She held her head on the wall and kept her breathing down so no one can hear.

"Itai! Dammit! Who the hell puts a fucking garbage can in front of a shitty ass table?"

"I don't know. Maybe it flew over there."

"It's gonna fly into your face if you don't shut up, un."

"Ok Deidara sempai."

Said Kunoichi couldn't believe what she was hearing just this moment. It sounded like the most erratic murderous group ever, the Akatsuki. Those murderers where smack dab in her kitchen doing kami knows what and Sakura can't stop it. Those voices all were so alive and gruff, like a ghost that took refuge in her house. Aren't they suppose to be dead?

To answer that simple question all the kunoichi did was let out a very loud scream.

o00o

"AUUUUUUUUGGGGHHHHHH!"

Three figures woke up to the annoying female screams that spread over the horizons. It mixed in with the uprising sun.

"Hmm? What was that?" Asked a lazy voice.

"Sounds like a cat getting raped." Answered another sleepy voice.

While the two people debating over where the voice came from, two others were duking it out in the open plains. To the north was a medium sized man with duck ass hair. Well to the south was an ugly ass red haired female with glasses. What were they doing perhaps?

Of course he was running away from her.

"Sasuke kun! Come here!" She screeched.

"Go away Karin."

Karin ran faster trying to catch up to him. "But wait, don't you want the poison out your system?" She asked innocently.

Suigetsu got disgusted at her voice. "Aw, pipe down bitch."

"Shut up Suigetsu!" She roared like Cerberus.

While Sasuke ran away from the evil female, he was thinking about the familiar screaming from before.

_'Is that you Sakura?'_

Thwack! While he thought and thought the Uchiha tripped and slipped on a fallen tree branch. Sasuke stared at the ground in anger unknown to what was about to happen. His onyx eyes widened but ceased as an upcoming shadow closed in on him.

"Oh my Sasuke kun wants to take the sex toy from behind." Spoke Karin in a whorish way.

_'Sex toy?' _He thought with his eyes widened in shock_.  
_

**'OMFG, outer teme run for your life!' **Shrieked a familiar voice.**  
**

_'Inner Naruto? Get the fuck out of here!'_

Too late, Karin conquered him from behind. Such a sad ending for this stochastic Uchiha.

o00o

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Black ears stood up in alert as the voice entered it's ear drums.

_'What was that?'_

On the other side white eyes twitched with reaction to the black ones. **_'Somebody grand! Maybe he can scratch my ears.'_**

_'No way stupid, obviously the voice is located all the way across Konoha.'_

_**'No your stupid, stupid.'**_

A red vein poped up on blacky's head._ 'Stupid ass!'_

Whitey laughed at his partner. _**'Oh my, the ass doesn't talk either.'**_

0.0

o00o

Pit pat, pit pat.

Medium sized paws scratched at said kunoichi's door. Just earlier she scooped the box up with her monstrous strength and tossed it down into the basement like cellar. She dusted her hands off pleased with what she had just did and headed straight for the kitchen to make a little snack before going to bed.

"Woof, woof."

"Arf, arf."

"Rooo, Rooo"

"Asdsfddf.."

**'What the hell was that?'** Cursed inner.

_'I dont know. It sounded like a dog with a keyoard stuck down it's throat.'_

**'No, it sounds like it ate that keyboard, and the mouse too.'**

Sakura didn't dare to get up and answer that horrible annoying sound that kept bouncing off the white walls. So the noise continued to waltz around in her mind for a couple more minutes till she couldn't take it no more and answer it completely. Said girl got up stomping down on the wooden floor getting ready to throw the door open off it's hedges.

**'Here I come bitches. I gets money!'** Laughed inner while sticking up the middle finger.

_'Shush. This isn't the boondocks section of fanfiction net.'_

**'Whatever. I'm just getting started.'**

She reached for the black handle and broke it off then made her way down the steps into the cold wet basement located at the bottom of her house. As her quick steps hammered the wood something was waiting very patiently for her down below. Like she gave a damn if it was the boogie man or a resurrected Freddy from Friday the 13th.

Sakura paused on the middle step as loud growls and barks could be heard from down below.

"Show your self or else I'll shoot." She threatened.

"With what?" asked a voice. "Your pussy? Cause I can see through the night gown your wearing." Laughed a rough male voice.

"Eek! You do?" She shouted, blushing at what the person just said.

"Hehehhe, your funny." Laughed another voice.

Except it wasn't a person, looked more like a...

Yay! I finally revised chapter one, a short chapter one. The reason why it's so short is because this is just a side project. Also, I'm busy with updating my other stories so you know I can't update all of them at the same time. Well, it's moving along very nicely and I hope I can complete the next chapter by the time school starts.

Anyways, review if you want and sit tight for the next chapter. Bye.


	3. Nocturnal Basment Crazies

Hello peeps, I have finally decided to update this wonderful fic. I apologize for taking so long, busy with school. Like I said before, this is just a side project, I will be doing only three animal based fics. This one, my first kitsune story, and the next one will be about cats. Enjoy.

Chapter two: Nocturnal basement crazies

Dog.

D-o-g, dog.

Inu, hond, pon, kain.

That's what was stuck on her front lawn during Christmas morning wrapped in a large box. What made this little kunoichi more crazy was the fact that there was more than one waiting down on the bottom step. Each one was panting and kept their attention on Sakura making her squirm and feel restless.

She slowly backed away from the steps and proceeded into the living room.

**'Ignore them and go find a flash light.'**

_'Roger.'_

Sakura left from the door way and ran around in each room looking for a flash light. She found one in the closet and ran back near the door and shined the light finding no aliens down below. Sakura scratched her head in confusion and heard a loud crash coming in from each direction. The dogs must have got up the steps and flooded the house, she can tell by the fresh paw prints on the floor.

Deciding to combat them one by one, she created a few shadow clones and took flight. Clone one hit the kitchen and found a black dog ripping up a scroll in shreds making the clone scream in horror. It heard the shriek and glared at her intentionally not evening making her tense in reaction to his boldness.

"You don't scare me Cujo."

_'Nether do you kunoichi.'_

Clone Sakura gasped at it's speech advancement and took a fighting stance. "Bring it on burnt cookie."

Cujo charged towards the girl with his fangs bared and got kicked by her foot sending him flying into a wall. Said dog hit the wall with it's back causing a huge crack to appear in the wall. Clone Sakura smirked and began walking away for a few seconds when she fell down face first on the title floor.

She looked back and found Cujo sitting on his back and flicked him off the floor with her two fingers. He was suspended in the air until he unleashed his killer fangs and punctured the kunoichi's bare skin.

She droped his in pain and he hit the floor again slamming his claws on the tiles so he won't fall over and charged once again. Clone Sakura dodged his bull like attack and stole a red dish cloth from the sink and began blowing it in the wind.

"Tora, tora, midnight." she repeated and moved away from his attack. "Ole!"

Cujo did a wide turn and galloped towards her and slipped on a broom stick causing him to skid on the tiles. Said kunoichi watched him crash into the refrigerator and faint on the tiles with a passed out expression on his face. She walked closer and closer closing the gap between her and the black dog with red eyes off the exorcist.

"Night, night." Clone Sakura grinned devilishly with a potato sack over her head.

He has been caught.

Meanwhile in another room, clone Sakura number two was taking down two dogs in the living room. She couldn't find them anywhere and finally checked under the couch where the brick red one was courageously blocking a golden one. He was hunched over his partner that was laying down on the ground constantly dropping his tongue in and out in the air.

A kind comment came into her mind when Sakura caught sight of the golden dog's belly. "Aww, she's pregnant." she cooed warmly.

_'I am not, un.'_

"Oh." Sakura replied and paused, "Wait a minute, dogs can't talk."

A rough voice entered her head. _'There's lots of things you don't know about us.' _It was the red one.

Sakura watched the red dog circle around her like wolves cornering a sheep. She was not lamp chops, but a human being! Clone Sakura started chasing Balto around and caught it by the tail. She stumbled back from his weight and toss the dog up in the air. The other dog stared at Sakura then back at Sasori who just landed on the crushed coffee table.

_'Umm, hi?_' He greeted cheekily.

Sakura stared him dead in the eyes and went, "Shut up Golden Grams." and picked him up from off the ground and walked away.

'No, I will not be silenced!' he barked into the distance.

Clone Sakura rolled her eyes as she walked down the halls with her golden Teddy gram engulfed in her arms and kicked the door down with her right foot. She entered inside and found six other dogs either knocked out or tided down with rope. The other clones greeted her with a smile and a thumbs up then poofed away into the scent filled air.

Dog air.

"Ew, sweat and feces." sakura said in disgust with her hand on her nose, "What should I name each of you?"

Hearing the kunoichi's voice, a black furred dog with a Halloween masked furry face spoke up, "What do you mean by that? You already know our names from batt-" His body was head butted by a silver furred dog with pink purplish eyes.

"Shut the fuck up!" he growled viciously.

Sakura stared at the silver one like he was retarded, "Buck I don't like your attitude."

"Buck?" he repeated crazily seeing red.

'Hahaha, your from that book, un.' Snickered the golden dog.

"Golden Gram hush!" she silenced the dog making him whine in annoyance. "Now let me see here.." Sakura trailed and looked around the room. "I got a Golden Retriever, Alaskan Malamute, Black German Shepherd, a Portuguese water dog, an akita and two other dogs I have no idea about."

Golden gram frowned at the name given, _'Why the hell is Sasori danna an akita?'_

_'No duh bitch, it's cause the kunoichi thinks he looks like one.'_ Hidan smirked.

The black dog wasn't really paying attention and looked up towards the window. _'We still need to bust Pein out of the pound.'_

_'Pein! Pein! We forgot Pein!'_ the orange coated black dog yipped excitedly.

"No duh, un. We can't go back outside and find him now because that girl is holding us captive." Deidara grumbled.

_ 'Well just have to wait here then.'_ Itachi said coolly.

Suddenly, Sakura's voice was being heard calling them out from a distance. They didn't bother listening and went around barking at each other causing Sakura to blow a fuse. The dogs collided with each other and fell down covering their ears with their paws after a terrible noise entered through their ear drums.

Golden Gram looked at the girl that was grinning like a mad man. _'You bitch.' _he sneered.

"Oh hush, I need to give you each a bath."

**~Later on~**

"Get your asses back here!" shouted a female voice.

Seven dogs sped down the hall ways like bullets and hid behind some furniture. Stomping can be heard from the distance as two dozen clones came running towards the back. They were drawing dust causing the inus to hack and wheeze like crazy.

Deidara was spinning around and fell. _'Shit, I'm down.'_

Tobi watched his pack member fall and moved back startled when the evil ghost took him._ 'Deidara sama!'_

"Come here mixed breed.." Called out a ghostly voice.

Tobi leaned back and was about to make a break for it when a ghostly hand reached out from the dust and captured him. As a last resort the dog flashed his teeth and dug in the creatures flesh. The hand let go in pain and the dog ran out from the corner and hid under a couch.

His tongue was sticking out and his chest was puffing in and out in exhaustion. Tobi was going to fall asleep when the couch was knocked out from over him and he was exposed to the evil female kunoichi.

"I got you!" and he saw nothing but black.

.

"You dumbo, stop flinching."

Tobi flinched under her touch. _'Ugh, where am I?'_ he barked lightly.

_'In the tub. Her massages are nice.'_ Itachi replied calmly. _'To the left kunoichi..'_ he instructed and felt her hand on his left ear.

Tobi looked around and found his friends being soaked in suds and seemed past out in the warm water. He was about to go help them when some of the dogs rises up from the suds and began barking.

_'You were out for a while, un.'_ Deidara stated and shook him self clean. _'Were going to the pet shop after this, the kunoichi said so.'_

"Your next Harold." Sakura said and lightly lifted each dog out of the tub except Hidan.

Hidan began running from her and hid in a pile of suds._ 'You'll never capture me bitch!_' he barked with his head out from the suds.

Sakura frowned at the white dog's antics. "Harold, what are you doing?" and watched him get a little testy.

_'Don't call me Harold you suniva bitch! Do I look like a fucking shitty ass Harold to you?' _the silver dog barked at her violently.

"Oh my gosh, your rude as hell. No kibble for you tonight." she said and waged a finger at him.

_'What the fuck are you talking about? Your rude too!'_ Hidan snickered and got picked up by the human.

Finished with washing them, Sakura took the rest of the dogs out one by one and walked away into the halls. Back inside the doggie Akatsuki was doing too well. Each one was taking out their frustration on either an object on the floor or on other dogs.

_'Ugh, I need to fuck.' _Hidan cursed and began dry humping Tobi.

_'Gaah, leave me be!'_ Tobi whimpered and hid in a fallen close hamper. _'Yummy, panties.'_

Hidan's ears stood up at the sentence._ 'Did you just say panties?'_

Deidara poped up from behind the door. _'Where, un?'_

Hidan and Deidara glared at each other and began running in different directions and headed straight for the clothes hamper. Tobi yipped and burrowed into the female's close so he wouldn't get run over by the bigger dogs. Both pack members dove into the clothes and began swimming with the panties and bras.

_'Aah, this is the life..'_ Hidan said in a relaxed tone. '_Nothing like inhaling the scent of a bitch.'_

_'I agree.'_ Deidara barked in agreement and walked near Itachi. _'You wanna whiff?'_

Itachi stared at the golden dog like he was retarded. _'Me catch a whiff of another male? Hell no.'_

Deidara's blue eyes peered up at the red thong stuck on his head. _'Oh.' _and dropped it on the ground_. __'Now you can, un.'__  
_

The black dog pushed it away with his paw. _'No thanks.'_

_'Ok then, more for me.' _Deidara grinned and planted his nose on the fabric.

Sasori_ sa_t still on the tiled floor and looked around, _'Where's Kisame and Zetsu?'_

_'I have no idea.'_ Itachi replied flatly.

"Gaaaaahhh! Get out! Get out! Get out!" Shrieked a voice from down stairs.

Everybody waited patiently when two dogs entered the bathroom with cheeky grins on thier faces. One was a blue color while the other dog was mulit colorful sporting black and white designs down his back.

'_What's up?'_ Itachi barked.

Kisame looked at him like he was high. _'I saw titties.'_

Hidan overheard the conversation and got angry._ 'The fuck? All we saw was dirty bras and panties and you got to see the real thing, that's grimy.'_

Sasori shock his head in shame and heard a loud thumping noise from outside._ 'What's that?'_

Suddenly, a person was at the door way with a retarded smile on his face. "Oh shit, puppies!"

They're screwed.

**A/N: **I love this chapter, so much action going on. I can't believe that only two chapters plus this one has been published. I'm so ashamed of myself, what makes matters worse is that Christmas is waiting around the corner. I will update when I get my laptop, hopefully. That's in about a week and a few days. Send over five updates and I'll update even earlier than what I plan for, bye.


	4. Pet shop hysteria

Happy late new year everybody! It's finally 2011~ I got this review telling me that I should feel disappointed and guilty about myself for not keeping my word on updating after getting five reviews. I should be ashamed shouldn't I? The reason why I don't bother updating because I thought no one was reading this. I guess some people are still.. Let's go on then! ^^

Chapter Three: Pet Shop Hysteria

"Oh shit!"

All the dogs froze in fear. There was a small figure at the stage of remaining a child was in middle of the door way. She was about six summers old and held onto some dimples forming on each side of her face into a twisted smile. The girl ran straight towards them and stopped when the dogs scattered away into dozen locations all over the house. Her shoulders shrugged and the girl ran all around the house searching for her new friends.

Deidara was hiding underneath the couch with Sasori. _'Who the hell is that?'_

_'Perhaps its the kunoichi's child.'_

_'Her daughter?' _He repeated in shock._ 'I can't believe that horrible devil can create spawns.'_

_'I have no clue..' _Sasori replied and found his self being dragged out from under the cushion.

_'SASORI!'_ Whined the Golden Retriever.

The Akita was face to face with another pink haired girl. Instead of her eyes being green, it held a coating of blue sapphires. Rather her hair being long like when their mothers thrive for their little girl to be a little woman, hers was short. He blinked in confusion and remained still as the girl's hand tapped him in a slow petting process over his head.

"Nice doggie.." She smiled.

Sakura appeared with a hint of worry on her face. "Mei, what did I tell you about cursing in the house? I heard you in the other room."

She looked up at the older female. "My bad onee chan.." and dragged her shoe across the floor like a broom in shame.

The elder Haruno calmed down and smiled. "So, you like the dog?"

"Yes I do, he's very handsome."

"See Sasori? She said that you're handsome." The pinkette smirked at said Akita.

_'What ever..' _He thought with bored eyes and walked away.

Mei watched him leave. "Where is he going?"

"Don't bother, he comes and goes as he pleases." Sakura said in a bored tone. "There's more if you want one."

She brightened up like the sun. "Really?"

"Yeah, that's if you could find one."

"Okay." Mei smiled and looked around the room spotting a dog near the hamper. "I see one!"

"Wher- Oh god, not him."

Sakura watched her little cousin walk towards the dog, an Alaskan malamute. The dog felt cornered and moved backwards backing up in the corner of the house and started foaming at the mouth causing Mei to shiver in fear. Sakura felt the need to save her little sister and stepped into the confrontation and swiped the girl's body out of Hidan's view.

"How about I pick out the dog for you?"

"Okay, but can I get it from somewhere else? I don't like these dogs you have here."

"Alright, if that's what you want. I need to get some supplies for them anyways."

"Ooh, ooh! Can I walk them with you to the pet shop?"

"Sure."

The two girls exited out of Sakura's apartment with some leashes tied around their furry necks. She had a dozen spare leashes tucked away in the house from the previous owner who owned this establishment. They walked down the side walk and got plenty of attention from the it was a whisper or shallow remark or just plain staring, they were getting a lot of it. Hidan gave them the stink eye and smirked when the stupid people stopped eye balling his enormous size.

He moved up and ignored the tighten grip on his collar _'Get the fuck off my dick you old shits.'_ Hidan growled.

"Aaugh, get this creature away from me!" Cried an old lady with her hands in the air.

"I'm sorry Miss Tohru, I'll remove him right away." Sakura apologized and tugged on the leash pulling him away. "Come on Hidan, let's hit the road!" She sucked her teeth and heard a loud gasp from afar.

"D-did you just say hidan?" Questioned the old lady in surprise.

"Yeah, I named him that. Now move aside before he runs you over with his giant monstrous body."

Miss Tohru watched the girl leave out of her sight. Her hazel eyes stared into the back of a particular kunoichi being hounded by some boys asking her out. Her eyes winded when one of the dogs attacked and bit the boy so hard in his nuts that he fell over. Sakura bent over and attempted to heal him when some medics arrived and put him on the stretcher.

"That is just not natural." The old lady muttered to her self. She narrowed her eyes in suspicion. "I have to figure them out before it's too late.." Miss Tohru pulled one finger into the air and screamed at the top of her lungs. "TO THE BAT CAVE!"

(From afar..)

Sakura's head was turned. She was facing the shouting older woman. "That old bats gone crazy.." and settled her eyes on the dogs. "Let's go now shall we?"

They barked in agreement and moved along with her. Mei was far behind and gazed over in helplessness and watched her older cousin lead some dogs down the street. She groaned in exhaustion trying to get one dog to pick it's body up and follow her. Mei fell down onto the floor and narrowed her eyes at the cautious shepherded.

"Out of all the dogs in onee chan's house.. I had to be stuck with you."

Suddenly, a dry feeling found it's way into her throat. Mei got thirsty and took out a juice box from her pack. She guzzled it down and carefully placed it on the side walk and ate a few pretzel rods. Once she finished devouring half of her stash, she twisted her body around and found that her only source of refreshment was gone. Including h

"Ooh, what kind of a watch dog are you?"

"Mei! What's taking you so long?"

"I'm coming Sakura!" She shouted back at her cousin. Mei tugged on the leash. "Come on you, were leaving now."

Said black canine raised an eye brow at her. _'Excuse me?'_ and it's ears stood up when a squirrel raced by._ 'SQUIRREL!'_

Itachi dragged her down the block and got lifted up by Sakura. _'What the hell are you doing? I wasn't finished chasing that squirrle and ripping it to shreds.'_

"Oh hush. Mr. Risu wasn't doing anything to you."

The dog rolled it's eyes and decided not to further the conversation. He twisted in her grasp and located the squirrel over near a shopping cart.

_'I hope you get run over.'_

_'I hope you got worms up your ass crack.' _It joked back and left around the corner.

Itachi growled viciously and struggled to get out of Sakura's grasp. She didn't let go and pulled his body into the pet shop. Mei trailed in later and left the older kunoichi's watching range to go look at the colorful variety of fish. Sakura let the dogs do the same and allowed them to roam free in the store. Each dog scattered in different directions and began looking around for a delectable meal.

Hidan ended up near a talking parrot. _'Haha, Polly want a cracker?'_

"Polly smash a cracker, raaa!"

_'The fuck?'_

"Fuck the world. Raaa!"

_'Oh hell no! Fuck you bitch!'_

"Hell yes! Fuck you bitch! Raaa!"

Deidara appeared near the dog. _'Why are you arguing with a parrot?'_

_'I don't know. But it's making me mother fucking mad!'_

_'He seems okay to me..'_

"I fucked your mother. Raawww!"

_'WHAT?'_ Deidara roared. He turned towards the white coated dog. _'Did you just hear what he just said?''_

"Did you hear what your grandmother just said?"

_'Ooh, your making me mad..'_

"Ooh, your so sad. Call an ambulance. Raaww!"

_'Bwahaa! This parrot is a genius.' _Chuckled the malamute.

"This dog is an idiot. Idiot! Idiot! Raaa!"

Hidan had enough of this. He went into reverse and charged forward jumping and slamming his body into the cage. The bird let out a squawk and fell over to the bottom of the cage. Deidara hovered over the cage howling in delight as his friend swiped his claws through the bars.

Polly dodged a blow. "Is that all you got? Raaww!"

_'Fuck no!'_ He barked and bit down hard into the metal. The bird froze in shock and didn't move an inch when the cage separating it's small feathery body from the human world opened. The two dogs honed in on the passed out bird and froze when a scream echoed across the aisle.

"What's going on here?"

Sakura popped up and hid behind a stall of dog food. "Oops, incident on aisle weirdo.."

Said clerk blew a fuse. She turned around and pointed a finger at the kunoichi. "Get your crazy dogs out of my shop this instant!"

"I'll do that as soon as I find them." The pinkette stated and looked around the room. "When ever that happens.." She sweat dropped.

"I'll give you fifteen minutes to round them up."

"Alright. I'll be prepared for the being throwing out the store procedure."

The kunochi walked all over the pet shop and couldn't find them anywhere. She quit moving her feet and put her ninja skills to work. _'Remove any sounds and work with the objects around you..'_ She thought mindlessly and kept quiet throughout the whole procedure. Sounds of barking and a child's laughter registered into her brain. She followed it to the back and came across all the annoying dogs sticking their noses near the other dogs cages.

Mei turned her head and ran over to Sakura. She was pulling her older cousin's hand. "Ne, these dogs want to get another one in their pack!"

"Another one?" She questioned and froze.

_'Pein... She's talking about the leader.'_

**'He's not the original leader, Madara is.'**

_'So what! What ever the hell their planning lead us here. It all makes sense..'_

**'That they want a new pack leader? I don't get it.'**

_'I'll tell you later inner. Right now I need to focus on getting him out of here.'_

Sakura rushed towards the glass and watched a Siberian husky with orange fur tense up from the closeness. What made the dog stand out from the rest was a pair of silver irises with circles going around like the target symbol. Her index finger touched the spot where he lingered.

"You're Pein right?"

The dog nodded and placed it's nose on the glass. _'Are you here to release me?'_

She didn't answer his questioned and busted the But,glass with her gloved fist. Pein moved out the way so the sharp particles won't impale him and leaped out the holding compartment onto the floor. Sakura picked up her already bought dog foot and collars then left out the shop undetected.

"WHAT HAPPENED TO MY DOG?"

Never mind..

**A/N: **Yay! Another chapter is done! I been got my lap top, so I have no clue as to why I never kept my promises. Perhaps my fingers don't want to type as much as they wanted to? 0.o Now I won't exactly promise an update right away so enjoy this update while you can. _But,_ if you send five reviews I'll do the next chapter right away. It's a fifty percent chance.. Bye ^^


	5. Flea collars, invasions, and Naruto?

Yay! Twenty three reviews and over five hundred hits. Here is the next chapter.

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Chapter Four: Flea collars, invasions, and Naruto?

People moved out the way when a pink haired girl and her eight dogs ran out the pet shop into the streets. They curiously spoke amongst them selves and stayed silent when another girl with less body mass and magnetic blue eyes was walking slowly out the shop and followed the dusty trail her cousin has left behind.

She stopped in the middle of the road with her arms up in the air. "Nothing to see here folks! Just my Sakura chan jogging with her doggies."

"What dogs? They look like aliens to me." Commented a villager.

"Well you look like one too if you actually bothered to look in a mirror." Mei replied with her hands on her hips.

The man grew angry and charged at her. But his girl friend blocked the man's movement. "Sorry about that, just a crazy boy friend under my care."

"It's alright." Mei grinned and walked off.

The little girl had a difficult time finding her older sister and was met with the opposite sex. She ignored some of them and found one older man that will not leave her alone no matter how much she tired. He was rather tall then how he described his self and kept his hands on his crotch area.

"Where are you going little girl?"

"Now where, just trying to find my sister." She replied calmly and froze.

_'Doh! I'm talking to a stranger! Okaa san told me not to talk with strangers, espically if it's a man.'_

**'About time you realized that.'**

_'Shut up inner Mei!'_

**'Fine. Get raped.'**

_'No, no, no! Help me out will ya?'_

**'Okay. But first, look around you.'**

Mei did what her inner voice has told her to do and scanned her surroundings. All she found was icicles hanging on the stores and houses, frozen ice out in the streets and scaling the corner of the side walks, children? There was a child behind the fruit cart and few others around the corner waiting for the next victim. Then a plan came to her. This spot was well known for snow balls being thrown at people that dare to walk the streets without any back up.

A Cherise cat smile formed across her lips. She turned and looked towards the pedobear.

He got spooked by her sudden affection towards him. Good, it was working.

"Can you please step over near me?"

There was a tinge of pink that settled on his cheeks. "R-really?" and got a nod from the girl.

He inched a step.

"Closer."

He took another step. This time two.

"A little closer."

The man leap forward and clouds filled with little girls floating around formed above his head. "Gimme your virginity!" He cried with tears flowing out of his eye sockets. The pedobear fell onto the concrete when Mei took a side step and watched as ice balls got volleyed into his face.

All the little boys and girls surrounded the fainted man. "We got you surrounded!"

"Acck, are you little bundles of joys my nightmare?" and got plummeted by snow.

Mei moved away from the attack and ran a little further down the block coming across a paranoid cherry blossom. The girl opened her mouth and flew over the wall into plenty of some dogs faces. She pushed them away and moved her hand back when Hidan snapped his jaw near her small finger bones.

The little girl slammed her fist like a hammer into his snout. "Bad doggie.."

_'Ow, you suniva bitch!'_ He growled and got taken back. Hidan shook his head and checked to see what was preventing him from sinking his teeth into the live lamb chops._ 'Aw crap, I'm tied to a stupid ass fire hydrant.' _and scowled when the dogs were laughing at him. _'Go suck an egg bitches..'_

_'We cant cause there's no chicken here.'_ Explained Tobi and he heard the dogs moan at his response. _'What?'_

_'You had to ruin the mood didn't you?' _Questioned Deidara.

_'How is the mood ruined? We got Pein back so there should be no conflict.' _Explained the mixed breed.

Speak of the devil, he entered the conversation in full force._ 'Now that I'm back we can discuss getting our original bodies.'_

_'Tobi think we can't because the kunoichi is hiding from that mean pet shop lady. Isn't that right Miss Sakura?'_

Sakura's chest was sinking high and then low like a silent snow fall on a winters day. Mei was watching her cousin anxiously move away from the brick wall and walk around the streets. She held tight onto the dogs and wasn't paying attention to the lack of oxygen from their wind pipes. Her vision was blocked by Itachi as he stood above her like a tree giving her some shade from the sun light. Mei signed in relief and slid down the wall keeping the dogs some company

Mei petted him. "For a mean dog you seem okay to me.."

Itachi was growling as a twisted smile claimed his face. _'Must stay calm..' _and looked towards the kunoichi that had her back turned. _'A little help could be nice.'_

The girl turned around not knowing what's going on. "Huh?" and resumed pacing the side walk.

Said German Shepherd groaned and sat down on the concrete placing his head near his paws. Itachi's eyes narrowed when the other Haruno girl tugged on his collar and remained there until he snapped. His jaws raged for a while and started raiding the black pelt glued to his body. The dog stopped and had a sinister look before diving back into to nick at his flesh. Deciding after three minutes of destroying his coat, Itachi made his way over to the little female.

He leaned in placing his nose onto Mei's face. _'You, girl. Scratch me.'_

She has mistaken it for playing. "You like my petting don't you boy?"

The Shepperd's eye brow raised at her._ 'What did you say? You must be mistaken for I am..'_ He quit thinking when her hand racked over his troubled spot. _'Ugh, that's the stuff..'_

Mei giggled when the male dog's tail flicked back and forth in happiness. She stopped scratching his fur to the dog's dismay to walk with Sakura.

"Are we going home yet?"

"Yeah, right now." Sakura replied and took the other dog's leashes off the floor and walked down the street. Mei was behind the girl pulling Itachi's leash so the dog could keep up with them. He lazily strides down the side walk and whined when one of the vermin attacking his flesh bit him. The kunoichi laughed as Itachi took the lead pulling her cousin past them and around the corner.

When Mei left out of her sight, she started talking with the other dogs. "What's going on with Itachi?"

_'I don't know, but I feel exactly what he's feeling..'_ Deidara transmitted.

Sakura looked around in confusion as all the dogs were scratching their bodies with their legs. Then something came to her, they all have fleas! Wasn't that bath she gave them enough as a repellent to block those types of diseases from happening? Bothered by their up scaling problem, she stormed into the house and gave them another bath. Once taking care of the Akatsuki turned pure breeds was achieved, Sakura went to making her little sister some lunch.

Bother Haruno sisters were in the kitchen. Mei colored in her coloring book while Sakura was busy opening some cans of dog food. It was just some, about ten cans filled with official brands of artificial ingredients Once she finished dumping the foul smelling gruel into eight bowls, she settled them down on the rug next to the sink.

"Here you go guys, dig in."

Sounds of galloping feet echoed across the kitchen. All the dogs charged over and crashed into the sink then barked at each other in confusion. Sakura banged on her head (because there's a pot there. No, she's not a pot head.) then the doggies changed course stopping near the dog food and chowed down. Kibble flew out of their mouths onto the floor like a messed up sewage system. Mei giggled and their sloppiness while her older sister groaned at their antics.

"Ugh, I just cleaned this floor."

"Can I take them out for a walk again?"

"No way, you'll get run over by them, eaten by them, touched by a pedo bear, demolished bu a meteor." and the list goes on and on and on. "That's the reason why I don't want you to venture outdoors."

"SAKURA CHAN!"

Mei's ears perked at the voice she got up and heard some one coughing. The little girl looked up at her older sister with a pleading expression on her face and smiled when Sakura told her yes, she could answer it. Her body left off the stool and she headed for the door. Which she could not reach the door knob and got help by Sakura.

"Can you see now?"

She nodded and moved towards the peep hole. "Who is it?"

A messed up version of Naruto and his cat appeared in the viewing hole. "Oh my gosh, you know who I am Mei Mei.." He grinned. The door opened in front of him and he walked inside letting the cat wandering in the two Haruno girls house hold. Then suddenly a harsh bark traveled into his and the cat's ear drums. "Oh shit, run Nemo! Run!"

Nemo, a white cat with a black spot going from it's back towards the tail wasn't listing to him. It let out a meow and rubbed against the Akita's paw before sitting down showing it's belly. Naruto's eyes softened as he can tell that his neko won't get killed by her pets. So he went back to talking with Sakura unaware that the animals were talking as well.

Sasori growled viciously and pushed him away. _'Get lost cat, this is a no neko flying zone.'_

It got up with a smirk. _'How? This place does not hold planes. '_ and looked around the room. _'It's too damn small to hold just a pile of grain and ice cream.'_

Tobi's ears twitched. _'There's ice cream? Where's the ice cream! Is it ice cream flavored cat?'_

_'No you moron. I am not on the menu.'_ Nemo replied and started licking his fur.

All the dogs made a disgusting _'Ewww'_ sound and left the cat alone to tongue clean his privates. When the Akatsuki abandoned the cat they formed a circle and started plotting on ways to get rid of the cat and capturing the Kyuubi for them selves leaving Sakura all along to grieve over her doggies disappearance.

_'Since when does she grieve over pets? I don't see any on the wall..' _Questioned Kisame.

_'I don't know..'_ Itachi replied and started scratching with his foot. _'Soon she will when I kill my self over these fleas..'_

_ 'What dumpster did you dive into today?'_ Asked a sinister voice.

The Shepperd's eyes closed in annoyance._ 'Did that cat just talk to me?'_

_'Yes. Tobi hear the cat talk.'_

_'Don't be so naive dog. I have just spoke that you flew into some dumpsters this morning.'_ Nemo was hanging out on the book case and traveled in font of some antiques knocking them down one by one with his tail. Deidara reacted by rushing over collecting the plates with his mouth and settled them calmly on the ground.

_'I hate this cat, he's ruining all her furniture.' _The golden retriever said in a nut shell.

_'Why don't we stop him? It's not like the damn mother fucker belongs to the Pope or Obama or something..' _Suggested Hidan.

_'Your right. It will soon die under my paws because I'm tired of it waving it's butt at me.'_

Nemo swished his ass from side to side._ 'Come be with me, I'm delicious!'_

Itachi moved his head away with his eyes close in disgust. _'Must.. ignore..cat balls!' _and got picked by Sakura. _'Put me down vile woman!'_ He threatened while chomping his fangs at the kunoichi.

"Oh hush, your not going to do shit to me." Sakura said and took him out back into the back yard.

Mei and Naruto were waiting outside near the pool Sakura set up. Itachi kept exchanged looks from the girl to the pool then started squirming around from her grasp. He stopped thrashing and whined when her fist connected with his genitals and sat there under her watchful gaze.

_'I hate you.'_

"I know that already." and dumped him in the pool.

Itachi came up from the water then growled when a sponge was in his face. He couldn't do nothing when the cleaning material missed his face on purpose and roamed down his back. The black Shepperd dog looked away and glared in boredom at a giggling little girl.

_'What are you laughing at? Quit giggling.'_

While Itachi was distracted by Mei, Sakura was busy with taking all these brown things off the sponge. "Ew, these are fleas right?" She questioned and shown them to Naruto.

"I think they are, how do you think he got it?"

"Probably from the pet shop."

"Ah, so you were the one that broke into the pet shop today..''

"Yeah." Sakura replied lazily and dropped the flea shampoo when a pair of hand cuffs claimed her wrists. "Hey? What's going on?"

"Sakura chan. Your going to jail for stealing."

Uh-oh, cheerios!

**A/N: **Hehee, you never seen that coming huh? Yes, stealing a dog is a felony, in fact stealing anything is a crime! Let that sink over in your mind when you think that my cliff hanger is a little unbelievable for your tastes. I wanted to change those happy go lucky animal turned Akatsuki plots into something else. Perhaps there will be a happy ending, not just right now.

I am thinking about expanding this past ten chapters, or perhaps when I feel that it's finished. Reaching a twenty chapter minimum over 50,000 words like my fox story has given me hope and enough inspiration that I can go past it and reach new heights of exploration. There will be another chapter for that story, once I find the right document on my lap top. So here it is! Reviews will be nice and add to my progression of the next chapter, which will be out very soon. Bye.^^


	6. Rock Bottom

Omgosh, now it's 27 reviews and over nine hundred and sixteen hits! Thanks a bunch for all this fluffy goodness. If you have to know, yes I am keeping track on it's status. Only because I like seeing my work advance.

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Chapter Five: Rock Bottom

Mei was bored and alarmed by her older sisters sudden vanishing act. Was it they're sudden run in at the pet store that has angered her blond onii chan into punishing her? She felt lost and abandoned wishing a way to reach her only onee chan.

The girl brought her knees to her chest and cried silently. Her sobbing were being heard by said dogs debating on whether or not to bust Sakura out and finish what they had started. But it seems like the only way they can get to her if there's human support.

So they decided to contact the distraught Mei. Itachi got up from his spot and stood there on all fours staring down on her. She recognized the lack of sun beams radiating on her coarse petal hair and looked up in the most reddest eyes she has ever seen. Was this dog a demon? Words couldn't come out of her mouth and instead her movements did the talking for her.

Mei got up and touched the leash leading him down the side walk. All the dogs exchanged looks with each other and scattered tracking down both cherry blossoms scents.

While the little pinkette walk down the concrete she was concocting a plan to bust her sister out. Do to her knowledge of the law, her holding compartment is first near the witness area then jail.

So for now Sakura will be at the interrogation center which isn't too far from here. Mei stopped in her tracks and gazed at the big tall building with wires all around it. Sensing an upcoming chakra source, she hid behind the brick wall and decreased her breathing power so they won't discover her presence.

The girl signed in relief and watched her pet get anxious. "What's that matter boy?"

Itachi's eyes narrowed._ 'Do not call me boy.' _and the hound left her side. _'Follow me if you want to save your sister.'_

Mei blinked for a moment then a smile crept across her face. She got a head start running after the black shepherd into the heavy armored area. The anbu multiplied in size and halted the girl from moving towards the cells.

Said pinkette took a bag of lemon heads and let them roll on the floor then made a quick dash for the hall way. All the men chased after her for a moment and fell over busting their asses on the shiny floor.

She turned around sticking her tongue out at the guards childishly and entered into the master mind section. Mei moved slowly holding her hands to her chest as the nasty pedo bears and rapists slurred dirty comments. Itachi slowed down and push the girl in front of him while keeping tabs on their surroundings.

Her blue eye's shined when pink hair came into view. "Onee chan!" she shouted but got no answer.

The girl frowned and ran up to the glass punching it with her tiny fists hoping to get a response from Sakura. Said older pinkette was sprawled on the floor with her hands on the concrete. It seemed as if she was in a dazed state and couldn't focus correctly. Her eye's slowly moved from the floor and laid on Mei's.

"Help me." She silently mouthed and fainted.

Mei watched helplessly as the anbu came by and took her sister out of the room. The girl turned away to see if Itachi was by her, which he wasn't and heard a manly scream. Her eyes widened in shock as the black Shepperd was biting the guard's crotch with his teeth.

Sakura was on her feet and punched another guard in his stomach. He fell over and reached out for the walkie talkie so he could call for reinforcements but it was too late. The young woman had the monitor and crushed it with her gloved fist.

"Your finished." and left in a swirl of cherry blossoms with her imouto. Both girls were on the roof of her home. She placed Mei on the marble and bent down to talk with her. "I can't be here any longer."

Mei looked her in the eyes. "Why?"

"You busted me out silly, and don't you forget it."

Was this her way of telling the little girl thanks? Mei shuddered when a harsh wind picked up around them.

Sakura felt it too and her eyes widened in shock. "Where's the other dogs?"

"Oh." Her sister replied out of the blue. "I forgot about them during the rescue mission, ehehe.." She laughed sheepishly.

Sakura groaned softly and put her hands on her hips. "You thought I wouldn't notice huh?"

"Who me?" Mei squeaked and heard a noise. "Ah, that's the doggies!" She exclaimed and almost fell off the roof, but her sister prevented the girl from falling. "Thanks sis.."

"No problem."

The two pinkettes climbed down together off the roof and were surrounding by numerous species of dogs. Oh yeah, a veil of criminal humans turned dogs was her life saver. Not.

"Where did you guys go?"

Deidara barked a couple times. _'Out to find you, un.'_

_'Not precisely, we also searched for clues on how you got found out.'_ Explained Pein.

"I already know the solution to my arrest. Seems that Ms. Tohru snitched."

_'That old bat? Tobi say we get rid of her!'_

_'If the kunoichi does that won't another felony charge add onto her record?' _Sasori questioned.

The other dogs frowned while each of their ears were flatten on their skulls.

_'Why did you go and ruin our plan?' _Whined Tobi.

"No matter. The truth will always set you free, I think.." Sakura trailed.

Mei tugged on her clothes. "Are we going back to your place yet? I'm sleepy.."

"Alright, this way." Her onee chan directed and walked down the path with her sister and unwanted pets. When they reached there, her door was busted down and out on the front lawn. Sakura gasped at the discovery and ran down the path into her home. The entire house was teared to shreds including the curtains and rugs.

Sakura bent down and picked up a medical scroll. "Seems like they been here not so long ago.."

Mei stood at the door way. "This is all my fault.." She said suddenly in a low voice.

The older female walked over with a weary smile. "Not it's not, there just here-"

"To take you away from me again!" She cried and ran out the door.

"Mei!"

Sakura followed her sister out into the street. But she was nowhere to be found. The pinkette walked back to her property and leaned on the fence touched the dried paint with her fingers. A soft sign escaped her lips as she stood there staring at the stars.

An animal crept by. _'Where did she go, un?'_

"Nowhere Deidara, probably back home safe where she belongs."

_'Why? Are you going somewhere too?'_

"Maybe, after that stunt she pulled today." She joked lightly.

The golden retriever moved closer and sat at her heels. _'Nobody would ever do that for me.'_

"Why not? I'm sure your loved enough to get that type of rescuing."

Deidara looked away._ 'Not where I'm from.'_

Sakura shot a worried face near him. "Really?"

Another voice got transmitted into the conversation._ 'That's normal for people like us.'_

"Mmm, some times I feel the same way." She agreed steadily. "It's not so bad when you have family to back you up.."

_'That's when they can except you for who you are.'_ Sasori barked.

Sakura felt calm nears these two, or just the Akatsuki in general. She has no clue why they're feared by every one. Deep down these men are all just like every day people. Except, kidnapping the jinchuirki and extracting your bijuu type of people.

Feeling comfortable by this, she popped the question. "Mind explaining to me why you guys are dogs?"

Silence took over the cold air.

"What? Was it something I had said?"

_'No. Your actually the only Sakura I read about in a fic that asked us why were like this.'_ Barked an amazed Deidara.

"Hold up. Were in a story?"

Sasori rolled his hazel eyes. _'Duh, fan fiction.'_

"Fine. Let's make this an experience the readers will remember then." She smirked with her arms crossed around her chest. "Spill it. Give me all the details."

_'Well it all started three weeks ago..'_

_Flash back.._

_A young man with long blond hair and a lone blue eye was stuck on the grass. He was bleeding with an open wound in his abdomen and crawled away across the dirt with his functional right arm._

_"Tch, stupid Uchiha bastard. I show signs of life and he comes back and kills me again, yeah. I'll show him that no matter how much I get stabbed and wounded, I'll reappear like nothings happened, un." He grumbled.  
_

_The man stopped complaining when a big busty old lady was towering over him. "Who are you, un?"_

_Some nasty ass grin swept over her face. "Why do you say un all the time?"_

_Deidara had a scowl on his face. "It's my damn catch phrase, un."_

_"Your a grouchy boy." She said with a frown. "Now what would happen if I turn you into a frog?"_

_"Mmm, interesting. If by a chance I turn into one, I can find a princess and turn me into a handsome prince like I already am."_

_The old lady got agitated. "Does this look like the Princess and the Frog category?" and stuck her hands into her pockets taking out blue sand on her palms. You need to be taught a lesson." Then blew it out of her hands towards the fallen male._

_Deidara got blasted by the sand. He shook his head removing the blue particles off his face and smirked. _

_"Is that all you got? I'm still he.." and started shrinking. Said boy found his body to be smaller then hers. "What the fuck did you do to me?" he roared and stopped when only a few barks came out of his mouth._

_"Hehehe, now you are my lackey." She snickered in utter delight._

_'Lackey? I am nobody's lackey.' He thought and ran into the forest._

_The old lady gasped and sent out groups of hounds to recapture him. She followed them and the runaway pup towards a base blocked by a giant boulder. Deidara skidded on his paws and head butted the boulder into tiny bits then ran inside. _

_Said hounds scurried into the base and moved around the maze searching for their new bitch. The old lady popped out of nowhere in blue dust and turned left to right searching for her victim._

_"Here doggy, doggy. Where are you? Miss Inugami wants to keep you as her own." She sung and felt a trace of new chakra. "Ah, new victims for me." and flew down the halls._

_Deidara reached the hang out area. He ran into the room breathing heavily and was spotted by the other members. Tobi got up from the table and started petting him._

_"What a nice doggy, are you lost?.." He questioned and got bit. Hard. "Ow! Mean doggy bit me like a steak dinner!" and then fainted._

_The Golden Retriever got sat on. 'Meh, get off me Tobi no baka! Un!' it barked._

_Kisame kept his eyes on the dog. "Sounds like he's trying to tell us something."_

_Itachi didn't look up from his poker cards. "If it's dogenese for I love you then don't tell me because I don't care for dogs."_

_Deidara's eyes grew red. 'Were in in danger! There's an Inugami in the base!'_

_But they weren't listing. Suddenly, she flew into the kitchen spooking the members into almost shiting them selves._

_"Ahh, it's an old ugly ass lady!" Shrieked Tobi._

_"Give her a powder puff. Her appearance is revolting." Itachi commented._

_"Ooh, you two deserve to be dogs too." Miss Inugami hissed and turned them into ones._

_End of flash back.._

"Soo, if you got turned into dogs then how did you get here?_"_

_'Zetsu brought us here.' _Deidara bow wowed.

"Zetsu? I thought he was turned into one as well?"

_'Um..'_

_'The gig is up. Thanks a lot Deidara brat..'_

"Seems like you were fibbing after all. Now who brought you punks here in a box and placed you on my front lawn?"

Their barking ceased to exist.

Will they tell her or cower in fear?

**A/N:** Ooh, Deidara was telling a lie the whole damn time! Now about Mei, she will be back soon. That's if Sakura wants to further her relationship with the little girl and become one big happy family again.

I loved the part when Mei and Itachi broke in to bust her out. Now that I revealed how they turned into dogs, there's foreshadowing that Deidara _could _be lying. Who knows, maybe I'm fooling my self! Reviews will be nice and add to my progression of the next chapter, which will be out very soon. Bye.^^


	7. Thou shall leave thy village

Mmm, it's nice to see this story progressing into an actual plot. Nothing much to say in this author's note.. Except this; Omfg, its March! Only about a week till Pokemon Black and White! I'm getting Black, what are you getting? I heard there's, well I looked at a fan site, that Riolou is in there! Squee, I love that Pokemon!

By the way, I changed the title again. Why you ask? Even though it's the third time I changed it this one is more suiting then the others. This time the new title will be permanent because I trust this new one. Well, I guess that's it for now until the end of the chapter..

...

Chapter Six: Thou shall leave thy village

Sakura was steaming like broccoli in a boiling pot. After all this time she thought that by some strange reason that an inugami slithered into the base undetected after following Deidara. Now the little weasel is telling her a lie and she can't actual recall what was really going on anymore. It was as if a giant fable erupted in her spilling all it's contents on the naive kunoichi's petite body.

She wished that these monsters will stop playing around and tell her the truth. After all, she risked her own life just to retrieve Pein and escape the death penalty. A sign escaped from her lips as she leaned to the right with her hand her hips.

"Could you please tell me the truth? I'm tired of running around acting like a damn criminal." She paused. "Which I am not.."

Deidara stared into her eyes._ 'Well, I don't think that you could take it..'_

"TELL ME!"

The golden retriever flinched from her loud irritating petite voice. He didn't want to keep her running around in circles but this is the only way to return him self and the rest of the organization back to normal. Whether she liked it or not, this kunoichi will be used to achive their reversed forms.

_'Alright, but first we need to find Zetsu.'_

"First it was find Pein, and now it's time to find the Aloe Vera. What else is new?"

_'Everything right now is new.' _Explained Sasori. _'Now you know how we feel when it comes to lying and getting what you want.'_

"I don't want this! I don't want the world to think that I'm no good anymore."

_'Whether your loved or hated, the emotions are still there. Now let's depart for our eternal modesty.'_

Sakura stood there struggling with her own thoughts. She felt tainted and corrupted about all of this and wished that dumb ass box was never found on her property. In fact, she doesn't even know who the hell left it there! Judging by Deidara's confusing facts, there could be someone else who dumped the problem in her direction.

She would never know until the perpetrator is captured. Which means leaving the village is necessary. But instead if she decides to remain in Konoha, the percentage of getting caught and going to jail was very high. Sakura couldn't stay here any longer as much as they could.

This was the right time to leave her village and bring those fools back to life. Her eyes got engulfed with tears and she wiped them away with her gloved hands. The kunoichi's body disappeared from sight leaving behind pink petals.

She emerged in front of a large house with no familiarity of it but her own. This wasn't her time or place to enter unattended when your on the run but she had to say good bye while her time is being well spent. Sakura slowly walked towards the garbage cans and hopped up on the can climbing the walls like a spider.

Her hands kept scaling the bricks as she crept higher and higher up the wall stopping at the top floor where her sister resided. The girl's body left the wall and she landed on the balcony then slowly moved over towards the screen door where her sister's room was located. Sakura pressed her hand on the glass and she gently knocked awaking the girl from her slumber.

Mei's eye were rubbed by the palms of her hands and she stared in awe at the object that stayed on the outside. Even though the darkness shielded her hair then wind made it flap around revealing green luscious orbs. She opened her mouth saying something that only her onee-chan could hear. Her older sister could only nod at the sentence and she disappeared with the wind.

Mei watched the petite girl float away into the breeze and went back to sleep knowing that Sakura would come back home shortly. Speaking of pinkettes, this one has a very fair newly established adventure on her hands. She has become and enemy of her village just for stealing a dog and breaking out the jail only a few hours later.

There might be a heavy bounty out for her head when they soon realize that this female was harboring the worlds most destructive organization. They were oblivious to her plot of leaving the village as a missing nin.

At first, she wasn't too sure of doing this. In her mind, wandering around the world trying to fix a dog turned terrorist group back to their normal forms sounds disturbing and odd. Next up on her list was how to establish a quick scheme into find a certain giant venus fly trap.

But first the ability to sneak out of her home village was essential. Also gaining a winter coat for the harsh conditions was essential. She left down the street hiding against the walls heading for her apartment. Entering her home, she confronted her room at the left side of the apartment sticking her hand into the steady wardrobe pulling out a warm winter coat.

Putting it on, she left the room and made her way towards the kitchen. Sakura pushed the lever out and ramshackle through her food stash and placed them in her pack before leaving her apartment completely. She avoided some anbu running around ordered to capture a pink haired girl with green eyes and made her way towards the gates.

Sakura laid low against the darkness watching the guards play poker and talk about naked women from play boy magazines. _'So, only pretty females were on their mind? How about butt ugly girls?'_ Thought the pinkette. While she talked to her self, a blue dog trotted over in alert.

_'No way, don't include ugly girls into escaping!'_

"What are you talking about? This is the only way I can leave the village."

_'Fine. Blind me with ugly no jutsu.'_

"Just close you eyes." She suggested lazily and turned towards the others. "Same to you weirdos."

Kisame obliged by the request and bent down into the earth shielding his eyes with his paws. Sasori, Itachi, Kakauzu, Deidara and Pein moved behind some trees blocking the sight from frying their eye sight. Tobi ran out from his hiding spot wagging his tail then feel over in whining in pain after the smoke cleared.

_'Axjskdhkdh, Tobi can't stand flabby breasts!'_

A furry malamute head turned from it's hiding spot. _'Let me see mother fucke- Auuggh, what the fuck man? I wanted to see d's not XL!'_

Sakura stood three feet away smirking at the successful blows done to the perverted male's ego. Kotetsu was on the ground passed out with bug eyes, but Izumo was fidgeting in his char. His eyes seemed to be clue making it confusion whether not he was disgusted or pleased by the quick strip tease.

"T..t-that was awesome!" He raved with his fists pumped in the air. "I always wanted to fuck with a fat bitch!"

The oversize woman got pissed. "I am not fat!"

Itachi crawled over on his paws._ 'Now is not the time to give your self away. Let's move.'_

Sakura nodded and took off running out of the village gates. Back in the both Izumo and Kotetsu were scratching their heads in confusion and exchanged a look of concern and bizarre qualities. Even though it felt nice getting a boner, they still had to report this..

-Outside Konoha's gates-

_'I'm hungry, un..'_

_'Tobi hungry! Tobi hungry!'_

_'Ugh, will you two shut up..'_ Moaned Pein.

Barking increased ten folds.

_'I'm mother fucking hungry as hell! Gimme some meaty kibbles and bits!'_

_'Oh joy, another has joined the group.' _He sweat dropped.

"All of you pipe down. I think there's some food in my travel pack."

The Akatsuki waited patiently for a piece of bread or water but nothing came. All the dogs groaned in hopelessness and scattered away from the kunoichi to hunt. Now they have to kill rabbits and chickens just to satisfy their stomachs. While the inus vanished from her view, that didn't stop Sakura from snooping in her pack.

She hit the jack pot with a bag of trail mix. Sakura carefully turned her head from left to right hoping that no bear or Sasquatch was watching. She signed in relief and tore open the delicious mix of granola and peanuts obviously drawing in attention from the forest animals.

Sakura arched an eye brow and screamed when a deer looked up her skirt. Her fist got balled up and she attempted to hit the fawn but it leaped away back into the bushes. The kunoichi spat at the departing deer and resumed eating her feast then stopped in mid chew when a whole army approached her.

Her body moved in reverse. "What the hell is up with these forest animals?"

She froze and began laughing. Sakura spun around doing the cha cha slide with a medium sized fox and squeaked when it weaseled it's way into her biker shorts. A fit of rage over came the kunoichi as she grew red at the eyes causing it to run away in fear. Pleased with her stink eye Sakura continued to eat her trail mix in a not so great environment.

Suddenly, coming out from trees was an Asian black bear. It made it's way towards her and stood up on it's hind legs ready to attack. Sakura stared at the male bear for a while before imaging a red suit and brown hat atop it's head.

"Aaagahaha, what's up Smokey?"

"Raaauggghh!"

"Yeah whatever. does it look like I have a lighter on me?"

Inner screamed when it moved towards them. **'He doesn't care! Hit the deck!'**

Sakura took her time and slammed the heel of her foot into the earth. A lively crack ereputed beneath her stretching through the earth ending up near smokey. UIt caved from underneath him sending it. Once the bear left the building, more creatures appeared.**  
**

A male deer with horns of steel approached her. Sakura got into a fighting position and moved in a circle changing directions with the king of said forest. While she stood in another angle of the forest, she wished that one of the dogs stayed behind. She didn't mind that Tobi or Hidan were left as long as the kunoichi had back up.

**'Don't act like a cheap damsel in distress! Do something!'**

_'I'm trying.'_

**'Saying that your trying isn't good enough.'**

_'Fuck this. I don't care if Bambi loses his father. I'm kicking his deer ass out this forest!'_

**'Thata girl!'**

Once Sakura quite talking with inner she charged forward. Bambi's father stood on his back hooves shaking his front hove back and forth before sprinting towards her. Both closed in on each other waiting for someone to deal the first blow. It lowered it's head ramming it's large horns with Sakura which she blocked with her fists.

**'Get em, get em! Knock em out, I don't care if it's lights are out! Goo, Sakura-chan!**' Cheered Inner.

Sakura ignored the cheering and pushed forward moving the buck in reverse. It lost its balance and fell over into the stream. Blood oozed out of it's skull tainting the water including a few dogs mouths.

'_Ew, what the fuck man? I was drinking over here!'_

_'Heheh, I'm so glad that I didn't stick my tongue in there, un..'_

Tobi freaked at the dead deer. _'Tobi say ew at it's eye balls! It's staring at Tobi!'_

"Will you guys quit screeching?"

_'Tch, I never screech.'_ Hidan snorted.

_'Yes you did! It went like this; Eeeeeeeeeee!'_ Mocked the chow chow.

The malamute resorted by snapping in it's face._ 'I didn't do shit you suniva bitch!'_

"Alright, alright. Cut all this nonsense out. We need to search for Zetsu."

Nagato wandered by. _'We cannot for he is on the lose around the world.'_

"Which means that we wandered all this way for nothing?" Wondered Sakura trying not to scream.

Tobi's front and back legs started trembling beneath him. _'Ugh oh. Tobi think we gonna die!'_

_'We are not going to die. By finding Zetsu or at least Konan, the spell will be broken.'_

"Konan? So she's the only member we need?"

_'Yes. For she has returned to Ame and range control on our people.'_

"Alright then. Were off to Ame."

Sakura moved passed the dogs then turned around facing them. All the Akatsuki members paused in mid step either cocking their heads to the side in confusion or staring at her in complete boredom. This time her statement will be the key to their maneuvering through out the villages.

"We can't keep moving like this."

_'Why not?'_ Barked Deidara.

'For we only speak through nonverbal communication. She wants us to act only as summons when asked upon.' Stated Itachi.

"Wow, I thought you guys were dumb as dogs."

_'I will ignore that statement. Do you have any scrolls on you?'_

"No."

Hidan grew berserk. _'What the fuck do you mean by no? How the hell can you suggest summons when you don't even have a bloody ass scroll?'_

"You shut up. Does it look like I can carry two on my back like Jiraiya?"

_'That's a great idea. We should ask him how to teach you to summon shit.' _Suggested Kisame.

Sakura felt played. "You mean all this time I could have remained in the village and discuss all of this?"

It grew silent in forest.

_'I guess so, un..'_

-Next day-

Daylight settled in between the trees. It greeted the pinkette by almost blinding her with it's deadly momentousness rays. Sakura blocked out the sun light with her hands and felt a smile tug on her face when a black dog blocked it by standing over her. She thanked the dog and made her self comfortable underneath the tree remembering what has happened over the past couple weeks.**  
**

Who would have thought it that all the kunoichi would have done was ask for a mission to leave the village and search for the only reaming members. Now her entire reputation is destroyed, all because of_ them_. Back in the village she could have just payed for Pein to be busted out from the pound.

But no, they had to have accompanied her. Accompany by messing with her family in the process. Sakura's relationship with her little sister is completely ruined because of these simple humanoid turned tyrants. If she had the ability to turn back time and make everything better, she would right on the spot.

Then her life in Konoha will be boring and worthless. She admits to it though it felt good to turn her goody two shoes attitude around switching it will a devil spawn persona. As she wandered through the forest with her eight companions, more thoughts flooded her mind.

Naruto and her friends back home will be on the look out for her. If she wanted to turn them into summons, she need to find Jiraiya and fast. Hoping that word hasn't gone out around the neighboring villages about her missing nin status, she went on a search to different places struggling to find the toad hermit's whereabouts.

Before she went any further, she stopped near a pond allowing the dogs to cool off and get a drink. Sakura moved away from the group sitting on a boulder tossed to the side from construction workers and took off her head band and slashed at it.

Her life in Konoha had been tossed aside.

Like her previous team mate, she will become the villain as well.

_'Alright, you finally dumped the village like a wet kitten!' _Congratulated Kisame.

_'Why would you dump the kitten? Tobi loves kittens!'_

_'Get out of my face Tobi-brat!'_

Tobi cowered in fear and ran away hiding behind Sakura's legs. _'Y-you'll protect me against fishstick face right?'_

"He doesn't look like a fish stick to me anymore. Just an ugly Portuguese water dog."

The forest grew quiet again. Minus the crickets.

_'What's a Portuguese water dog?'_

"You."

Kisame wandered around the area looking for a puddle to scan himself.

Itachi watched the blue dog. _'You don't need to look for your face is repulsive as it was when you were human.'_

"Itachi! That is not nice!"

_'What won't be nice is the Konoha nincompoops coming this way.'_

"Not now. What should we do?"

_'Scatter like roaches.'_ Barked Pein.

They all left in opposite directions for their lives are threatened by the ningens. Sakura moved towards the trees and went low into the shrubs watching a pair of feet wander pass her. She frantically moved her irises all over the place searching for the Akatsuki. A soft sign escaped from her lips as she noticed some tails and furry heads hidden behind a water fall.

If only her spot was just as good.

**Side notes! Fun notes! Quick notes! Egg yolks!**

**A/n:** Ooh, even more cliff hangers! I have no clue whether she was caught or about to be caught if her spot was more professional then it was fairly described. Yeah, my thoughts on what will happen next isn't good enough so you will have to wait till next time in the next chapter.

Oh yeah, I have no idea how to start chapter twenty one on my fox story. Thanks a lot evil thing I won't say for personal messed up my damn progress for the next chapter! Luckily I figured out the factory restore. Don't worry readers. It will appear either during spring break which will come up very shortly, or the summer. In the mean time, read these.

Reviews will be nice and add to my progression of the next chapter, which will be out very soon. Bye.^^


	8. I have a chapter!

Usual author's note

**What's up? Silent here! Well, it's getting close to the anniversary of this fic. **

**If any of you can recall, it was started on Christmas, which I'm very satisfied with. Except at first, I thought this story would fail.**

**Mostly to fall into the trap of those usual 'Akatsuki turn into animals plot' But it has not! As the story advances, it has a decent plot, with the usual spelling errors. Which I hate..Meh. That's what I think...Perhaps a beta reader is necessary since I can't keep up with it anymore. Anyways, there's a new chapter for you! **

**I just need to finish it. There's about 3,000 words or more. Once that comes out, the usual random updates will commence since I didn't label it under the hiatus list like the others.** **So if anyone is still reading this, just please hold on! Thanks for taking the time to read this.**

**-Silent Ookami**


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